Relationships Vs Social Media

"The more social media we have, the more we think we are connecting, yet we are really disconnecting from each other”(Cyber bullying). Social media is used to help us but it tends to lead to negative effects.  It has negatively impacted many relationships in America today.   It’s usage has greatly increased in the past 4 years.  According to Chandra Steele, “68% of people's relationships have been impacted by social media, 61% reported looking through their partner’s social media, and 53% of respondents chose facebook as their preferred social media platform” (Steele).  It increases your communication among people but also disconnects you when it comes to the relationships you have in the real world.   While all this happens, social media companies such as Facebook, Instagram, and Snapchat aren’t doing anything about it.   They see relationships being ruined everyday and they do not care. As a matter of fact,  “Social media platforms are designed to snare your attention, keep you online, and have you repeatedly checking your screen for updates” (Calucchia). There are an unlimited number of examples such as this showing how social media can cause strains in relationships.   

 Social media apps have a negative impact on relationships today due to their own destructive behavior.   We are going down a negative path in America when it comes to relationships.   People are spending more time on social media than they are spending time with their family.   Relationships in general are hurting due to the use of social media.  Aldous Huxley states in the novel, Brave New World, “Everyone belongs to everyone else” (Huxley 40).  This quote means that loving relationships don't exist and that people are just in relationships for pleasure.  This quote relates to relationships in today's society because it supports how relationships are deteriorating in today's world. 

Divorce rates are increasing yearly and there is a percentage of those rates that relates to the amount of time spent on facebook. It is said that people who use facebook often have a greater chance of getting a divorce. For example, “Divorce is becoming a common thing in the US and the rate is increasing every year. One of the trends related to the decreased number of children living in two parent families occurred because of changes in the divorce rate”(Kraynak). Divorce is becoming a frequent thing in the US. One reason for the increase in divorce rates relates to the amount of time a person in a relationship spends scrolling through their feed. For instance, “According to 15 percent of people, social media is absolutely dangerous to their marriage, while 16 percent can point their fingers to Facebook as causing jealousy in their relationship”(Chatel). Facebook is becoming a very popular way for people to socialize and has caused strains in relationships due to jealousy. 

Merriam Webster defines cancel culture as “ the practice or tendency of engaging in mass canceling as a way of expressing disapproval and exerting social pressure” (Cancel Culture). Cancel culture is currently a huge problem on social media.   People are cancelling others left and right just because of one thing they have said on social media.   It is a toxic relationship when it comes to canceling culture.   You can't say one bad thing on social media without getting ‘cancelled’. In addition, ¨The rise of “cancel culture” and the idea of canceling someone coincides with a familiar pattern: A celebrity or other public figure does or says something offensive. A public backlash, often fueled by politically progressive social media, ensues” (Romano). This also can happen with ‘regular’ people as well. Social media is the biggest platform used to cancel someone. Teenagers cancel people all over social media apps everyday and the apps aren't doing anything about it.  People are hidden behind screens and canceling people just because of one minor thing they may have done or said. This shows how people don't care about each other's feelings when it comes to relationships on social media. 

Covid-19 has caused a great increase in social media use which has led to a negative downfall for relationships. It is another major reason why social media apps are to blame when it comes to a negative downfall in relationships. These past 2 years, we have been forced to form relationships online while quarantining. This has led to poor mental health issues and the social media apps are not doing anything about it. For example, “Early evidence suggests that many people are spending time every day consuming COVID-related content-sometimes called doom-scrolling when one becomes caught in an unending cycle of negative news-and that doing so is associated with poorer mental health” (Buchanan). In the same way, “About two-thirds of Americans (64%) say social media has a mostly negative effect on the way things are going in the country today, according to a Pew Research Center survey of U.S. adults conducted July 13-19, 2020”(Auxier). In specific, both these quotes show and explain that covid- 19 has greatly affected relationships because lots of activities were online. 

Social media has caused a major rise in mental health diagnosis.  It can negatively affect your relationship with yourself. It is said that, “In today’s world, many of us rely on social media platforms such as Facebook, Twitter, Snapchat, YouTube, and Instagram to find and connect with each other. While each has its benefits, it’s important to remember that social media can never be a replacement for real-world human connection” (Robinson).  Relying on making connections with people over social media can negatively affect your mental health. It can leave you feeling isolated and depressed. In the same way, “The overall survey results show that higher levels of technology use and technoference adds up to significantly less time spent together as a couple, less satisfaction and connection, and higher levels of depression and anxiety¨ (New Study Shows…). This quote supports how social media negatively affects relationships. The more time you spend on social media, then more likely you are to have relationships and mental health issues. 

Digital relationships are becoming more popular in today's world, but it doesn't mean that they don’t have negative effects. The core interpersonal needs that people have do not develop with digital relationships as they do with in-person ones.  For example, “When you meet people in the real world, you typically see them in a social context, such as how they interact with workmates, friends and family members. One negative aspect of online dating is that you are dealing with a digital persona made of words and images”(Vandersteen).  This quote supports how digital relationships have many negative effects. Overall, face to face interactions have way more positive effects then digital relationships do. Talking to someone in person can let you see their emotions, feelings and responses to the conversation you are having. To be specific, “ If you can see your colleague's face, they can use your tone and body language to assign meaning to your words, avoiding misinformation. Also, if there's confusion about something you discussed, you can clarify your points instantly” (6 benefits…).  In other words, having a discussion face to face lets you read a person's emotions and feelings, while on social media you wouldn't be able to. Also, due to the pandemic, social media use has increased greatly. We are now using zoom, google meet, facetime, etc to chat with each other everyday. This has led to many negative effects on a person's overall well being and has had a negative impact on  the relationships they have formed in the past years. 

 All of these examples above relate to how these social media apps are destroying relationships and they aren't doing anything about these topics I have discussed.  Thus, “Social media works in much the same way. It tries to keep you on its platform for as long as possible and gives you the illusion that you are enjoying a service for free”(Platform). Many social media apps only care about promoting their app and making money. They don't care about all the negative effects it can have on people.  It is true that social media can help strengthen relationships however, social media has more of a negative effect on relationships in America today. 

All in all, it is clear that social media has a negative effect on relationships in America today. These social media companies only care about making money and advertising their products and apps. They choose to ignore all of the negative outcomes it has for people from using social media. If these companies keep going down this path of ignoring social media's major problems, society is going to be affected greatly in the future. 

Works Cited

Auxier, Brooke. “64% Of Americans Say Social Media Have a Mostly Negative Effect on the Way Things Are Going in the U.S. Today.” Pew Research Center, Pew Research Center, 15 Oct. 2020, https://www.pewresearch.org/fact-tank/2020/10/15/64-of-americans-say-social-media-have-a-mostly-negative-effect-on-the-way-things-are-going-in-the-u-s-today/. 

Buchanan, Kathryn, et al. "Brief exposure to social media during the COVID-19 pandemic: Doom-scrolling has negative emotional consequences, but kindness-scrolling does not." PLoS ONE, vol. 16, no. 10, 13 Oct. 2021, p. e0257728. Gale Academic OneFile, 

Calucchia, Christie. “Can Social Media Ruin Relationships?” Brides, Brides, 19 Mar. 2021, https://www.brides.com/social-media-ruins-relationships-5112042. 

“Cancel culture.” Merriam-Webster.com Dictionary, Merriam-Webster, https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/cancel%20culture.   Accessed 14 Dec.   2021.

Chatel, Amanda. “Why Social Media Causes Divorces, and 7 Ways It's Ruining Your Relationship.” Bustle, Bustle, 29 July 2015, https://www.bustle.com/articles/100673-why-social-media-causes-divorces-and-7-ways-its-ruining-your-relationship#:~:text=More%20Than%2010%20Percent%20Of,Source%20Of%20Jealousy%20And%20Danger&text=According%20to%2015%20percent%20of,causing%20jealousy%20in%20their%20relationship. 

“Cyber Bullying: The Negative Effects of Cyberbullying, https://www.ipl.org/essay/Cyber-Bullying-The-Negative-Effects-Of-Cyberbullying-FCSG7ZZ3UG. 

Huxley, Aldous. Brave New World, Harper Perennial, 2006.

Kraynak, Audrey R. "A historical review of research findings regarding the adjustment of U.S. children to divorce." Forum on Public Policy: A Journal of the Oxford Round Table, spring 2007. Gale Academic OneFile, link-gale-w9ba.orc.scoolaid.net/apps/doc/A191817966/AONE?u=nysl_li_harb&sid=bookmark-AONE&xid=333035c4. Accessed 29 Oct. 2021.

Mushtaq, Ahmad Jahed.   "The Effects of Social Media on the Undergraduate Students' Academic Performances." Library Philosophy and Practice, Apr.   2018.   Gale Academic OneFile, link-gale-w9ba.orc.scoolaid.net/apps/doc/A544712740/AONE?u=nysl_li_harb&sid=bookmark-AONE&xid=9b880203.   Accessed 14 Dec.   2021.

Platform, European Liberties. “Why Is Social Media Toxic? How to Deal with It the Right Way?” Liberties.eu, https://www.liberties.eu/en/stories/social-media-is-toxic/43494. 

Robinson, Lawrence. “Social Media and Mental Health.” HelpGuide.org, 3 Dec. 2021, https://www.helpguide.org/articles/mental-health/social-media-and-mental-health.htm. 

Romano, Aja. “Why We Can't Stop Fighting about Cancel Culture.” Vox, Vox, 30 Dec. 2019, https://www.vox.com/culture/2019/12/30/20879720/what-is-cancel-culture-explained-history-debate. 

Steele, Chandra. “Some Couples Say Social Media Actually Helps Keep Them Close.” PCMAG, PCMag, 30 June 2021, https://www.pcmag.com/news/some-couples-say-social-media-actually-helps-keep-them-close. 

University, Utah State. “New Study Shows Impact of Technology on Relationships.” Welcome To Utah State University, 18 Nov. 2019, https://www.usu.edu/today/story/new-study-shows-impact-of-technology-on-relationships. 

Vandersteen, Julius. “Negatives of Online Dating.” It Still Works, 10 Jan. 2019, https://itstillworks.com/negatives-online-dating-2834.html. 

“6 Benefits of Face-to-Face Communication (with Tips).” Indeed Career Guide, https://www.indeed.com/career-advice/career-development/face-to-face-communication. 

Molly Whisler